Moldonia - section 3

How do I get around Moldonia?

Mould Air has a large network of flights linking the major cities of Wisteria, Dermetitus, Hives Town, Scleroderma and Follicle City. Because of the vast distances in the country (Moldonia is around the same size as Western Australia and the Northern Territory combined), flying is the most effective method of transport around the country.

Mould Air offers a pass to visitors – the Meet Moldonia Pass is available for unlimited travel over 7, 15 or 30 days over the entire network. Details are given on the Mould Air Web site: www.mouldair.mol/meet/htm.

RAIL:

Although there is an extensive network of trains throughout the country, they are not to be relied upon to run anywhere near the timetable. In addition, intrepid travellers who have used the system have reported serious outbreaks of Moldonian Folk Singing throughout the journey, to such an extent that several have been hospitalised.

ROAD:

There is only one surfaced road in Moldonia – the M82 runs around some of the perimeter of the country, linking absolutely nothing. The then ruler of the country, Slobodan Scleroderma, built it in 1934 in an attempt to prove to the rest of the world that Moldonia was every bit as good as the Roman Empire. Money for the project ran out three quarters of the way through and the road has never been completed. Apart from the M82, all roads outside the major cities are unmade and not fit for westerners to drive on.

What about local transport in Wisteria?

Airport to Downtown:

Wisteria Airport is 22 kilometres north of the city and a 24-hour open-topped bus service is available, costing approximately MLD43,000. This is a great way to catch a first glimpse of the country as the road in from the airport runs past the famous Marshmallow Temple. In addition, many of the traditional 'burps' (wooden homes unique to the country) can be seen along the route.

One or two hotels in Wisteria offer a helicopter transfer however this is not a recommended method of transport due to the unsafe air regulations in the country.

Taxis can be hired costing MLD77,000 one way.

Local Transport:

City Trains

Wisteria uses old rolling stock discarded at the turn of the century (that is, from the 19th to the 20th century) by a range of Eastern European countries. Despite that, the system is quite charming and visitors can go by train to visit all the major tourist attractions. There are only 3 lines operating throughout the city and maps at all the stations are easy to follow. The major station in the centre of the city is Scabies Central. Visitors can purchase three day passes very cheaply.

Because of the relatively small size of the capital city, it is possible to walk between attractions easily. Wisteria is such a laid back city, the pace of life so grindingly slow that wandering through the almost-deserted streets is quite pleasurable.

When is the best time to travel?

Moldonia is situated wholly in the Northern Hemisphere. Winters are bitter – from November – February most of the country is covered in snow. Spring time from March to June is a good time to visit, before the mosquitoes, sand flies and midges start to plague the population. Temperatures at this time are around 4-18 degrees. Summer is a pleasant 15-25 degrees however the insects make a visit at this time particularly trying. Autumn is from September – November and is a great time for watching the leaves on the trees turn gold then fall off the branches.

What standard is the accommodation?

Visitors looking for 5 star luxury should not consider Moldonia. Most hotels are maximum 3 star by our standards. The best hotel in Wisteria, the Georges Dix is where most visitors stay and it is advisable to book early.

Activity

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